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first time. it was first time in my life i saw my bro cry until lidat. wheneva he cried, it was cos he was too angry wif someting. but tis time, cos of love.. his gf asked for a small period of break btween em, n my bro gave in, hoping everyting will be fine after tt. but when she told me she dunno if she still loved him anot n she dun miss him unless she wanted to, he saw wat she typed n decided to hav a talk wif her. dey talked n she told him she wanted her freedom.. he cldn't do anyting but to break up. he cried. i cld jus stand dere n watched. he confided in me alot of tings.
den da nx day, he decided to look her up at her hse. she refused to come down. he can't do anyting but to walk away.. he went to find his frens to pour all da troubles away. den when he reached home, he pretended nth has happened, cos my parents din noe anyting. den when he reached his rm, he called me in. den he confided in me again. he smsed her telling her lotsa tings only to get her reply few hrs latta. i still din slp n i saw him looking very upset after he read da sms. asked him wat happened. try to get his hp frm him. he refused to give it to me. den when i was abt to get onto bed. he came into my slping rm n looked for me. i asked him what happened den he walked away again, looking so weak.
i went to his rm n looked for him n he finally showed me his hp. "i dun love u anymore. dun come n find me or bother my frens anymore. i hav been very patient wif u, holding my temper." da sms read someting lidat. den he cried again. i looked at him, dunno wat to do. den he grabbed me n cried on my shoulder. i cldn't do anyting but to hug him n gave him my shoulder. first time in 16 yrs of my life, my bro cried on my shoulder. i guessed he was really hurt. den he told me to go slp, i stayed awhile n went bac to my rm. i din slp. i smsed his gf. 5 smses. telling her how cruel she is. we smsed for a while. she told me her feelings. but after those smses, i still feel unfair for my bro. he can't forget her 2 yrs ago cos she refused to talk to him face to face. 2 yrs latta, she came bac n looked for him. my bro accepted her bac in his life willinglly cos he still love her alot. now she lidat n still refused to talk face to face. how can he forget her tis way den?
she told me she loves freedom. wat i told her is, "nx time, when u tink u r ready to tear down ur wings n enter da love cage, prepared to lose ur single life's freedom, den go n love someone, or else dun eva enter a love cage n call out for freedom." i told her nv to come bac n look for my bro anymore. she said family is 1st, frens 2nd n bf 3rd. she said she love her family n frens more than her bf. i told her not to be even frens wif my bro anymore, or else he wun be able to withstand a stronger love. she said she dun wan lose me as a fren. but i dun tink i can continue being a fren of hers. after seeing tt sad look on my bro's face tis few days. after seeing his tears.. no. i dun tink i can.
i wonder y my bro n i r borned to be chi qing. i not trying to brag or wat here. but we r. i can like a person for very long, as long as 3 yrs. n i can continue liking him even if he has hurt me alot. even if he dun care anymore. yu, i can't tell u my feelings now cos i m unsure. i dun wish it will affect my studies but after Os, i will hav time to tink. even if i still lik him, lik wat i said, i dun wish to hear anymore tings abt him, i dun wish to noe his ongoings, cos i noe if i still lik him, tis is da only way i can completely forget abt him. i can't wait to get out of ai, cos alot of tings in tis sch reminds me of him. alot of peeps. even his previous cca. =\ dun drift apart frm him cos of me if u r tinking to do so, dere's not a nid. i doubt we r even frens anymore. u can tell him wat i said here, i dun care anymore. if he not happy wif me, come scold me all he can. i m numb anyway.
i m beginning to doubt love after so mani tings tt hav happened to me n da peeps arnd me.
dun go into a love cage until u r ready to tear down ur wings n stay inside foreva..
yours truly ;